THE GOOD OLE RULES OF THE GYM
There used to be points in time where people did not act like crybabies. Our gym has no crybabies.
Long, long, ago in America, there used to be places where lifters could take their shirts off, where women were not disrespected, where chalk was a plenty, where the depth of squats was never questioned, where lifters spoke the iron game language, where rock and roll was the pre-workout drink, where all supplements tasted like crap (but worked), and where winners, competitors, and beginners helped each other only by request not entitlement. Our gym is one of these places.
We are serious and we have FUN with these rules---don't be a crybaby.
RULES OF THE GYM FOR MEMBERS AND GUEST
1. If it comes to our attention, you will be asked to leave the gym if you hate Metallic, Van Halen, ACDC, or Journey. Basically, you are breaking rule number 21 (see below).
2. Don’t wear another gym’s gear in our gym, unless it’s of hardcore powerlifting origin.
3. If you break it, you buy it. (Strongmen, considered “notified” by us)
4. Return all equipment used in its proper place---in other words, put our stuff back where you got it.
5. VERY IMPORTANT: If you sweat anywhere in the gym, clean your sweat. We run a gym, not a mother’s day out or wherever you are used to working out. No one wants to work in your sweat.
Breaking this rule will be grounds for terminating your membership. Ask for the applicable cleaning supplies if you cannot find them. If you sweat more than normal, we suggest you bring a towel so that you can wipe things as you sweat on them and not “gross others out” wanting to use the same area or equipment.
6. Don’t drop our dumbbells. If you can truly handle a weight, you can rack the weight correctly. Ask someone to help you if you need help. We will teach you the correct grounding and racking techniques. If you want to get noticed, merely yell and scream (and this does not guarantee you will get noticed).
7. No member can use the 155-200 pound dumbbells without a special orientation. Using these weights without the correct teaching will be grounds for termination.
8. Do not drop metal weights on a barbell on the rubber floors. Use bumper plates or additional matting.
9. Do not slam the weights on the machines as you are repping—this causes cracking in the weight stacks—again, if you cannot control the weight, don’t use it—if you want to get noticed, merely yell and scream.
10. Do not lean weights against the walls, sides of the platforms, or any of the machines ESPECIALLY the side of the red Forza bench.
11. Do not spit in the gym or onto other members.
12. Wipe your feet before entering the gym. If your shoes are dirty, take them off or use the hose outside, dry them, and then enter the gym.
13. If there are kids or ladies in the gym (high school or grade school)—do not curse and cover any of your obscene tattoos or any tattoos that have profanity in them.
14. Express all concerns and questions to Matt Poe, 615-668-8760.
15. Don’t piss on the toilet seat—lift the top--
16. The bathroom is on the right as you enter the gym. The women’s toilet is on the left side as you enter the bathroom. The men’s toilet and urinal is on the right side as you enter the bathroom. Guys don’t use the women’s toilet. (1) person allowed in the bathroom at a time.
17. Although we don’t promote thievery, we suggest you keep an eye on your valuables. We do not reimburse for stolen goods.
18. Make a connection and instill confidence in someone else who needs help in the gym.
19. We offer an environment where people talk about lifting, get help from others, and ask for spots BUT UNSOLICITED COACHING IS NOT ACCEPTABLE > Do not coach anyone in the gym, UNLESS asked by someone for help. Otherwise, you become an annoying human being in our gym and place yourself in danger of EXPULSION and getting your teeth knocked out of your head by another member. If you want to be Mother Theresa, join the convent.
20. If one member comes to us and complains that you are an annoying human being, we reserve the right to kick you out and terminate your membership at our discretion, no questions, no ifs, ands, or buts---you are out. We are the judge and jury.
21. Don’t be a freaking crybaby!!!
DEFINITION OF A CRYBABY (Basically, if you consider a full squat going half way down or less, you are an official crybaby in the weightroom and in life). We offer deprogramming of crybaby attributes counseling.
SPECIAL RULES FOR THE CS89 MEMBERSHIP
1. Make sure lights are turned off, doors are locked, fans off, AC in office is off, and chain is locked on the outside fence. Basically whatever is on, turn off, and whatever is unlocked, lock it back.
2. Clean up all food and supplement powders from any area or surface that was exposed to your use.
3. In the back office, turn lights off, MAKE SURE REFRIGERATOR DOOR IS CLOSED ALL THE WAY (if you used it), turn ac and fan off if you used it, and shut the door. Turn heat off if you use it in the office.
4. Last but not least, DO NOT OPEN THE GYM DOOR FOR ANYONE YOU DO NOT RECOGNIZE OR KNOW. TELL THEM TO CALL MATT POE AT 615-668-8760 FOR INSTRUCTIONS.
HELPFUL AND FUN NOTES TO SURVIVE AT OUR GYM:
1. Ask Matt Poe what “Create Separation” means.
2. If you use a trapbar with the handles up (assisted work), this gym is not the place for you (unless you are a strongman). If you want to learn the right way (non crybaby way) we will GLADLY teach you.
3. If you use straps to record a PR on A POWERLIFTING deadlift (assisted work), this gym is not the place for you (AGAIN, unless you are a strongman). If you want to learn the right way (non crybaby way) we will GLADLY teach you.
4. If you use straps with the handles up on a trapbar (most definitely assisted work), you are definitely a strongman, so don’t cry if no one gives a crap how much weight your doing. If you want to learn the right way (non crybaby way) we will GLADLY teach you.
5. If you do not know the difference between a pushpress, a strongman press, and a push jerk, we will GLADLY teach you.
6. If you are in the habit of acting like a fool in the presence of a lady, this gym is not the place for you.
7. If you cannot separate emotions from business matters of the gym, this gym is not the place for you. We have a THIRD PARTY ADMINISTRATOR to handle all payments and non-payments. Matt Poe will not handle these issues.
8. If you cannot accept a nickname and take your nickname personal from Poe’s Gym Metallic Powerlifting and Strength, this gym is not the place for you.
END